Monday, November 3, 2008

"I Went to the UK and all I Got was this Lousy Squirrel Bite."

But no, really.

Before I enter my recap of the week in the UK, let me add a little enlightenment to the last bit of the vacation.

Leave it to me to create a bit of entertainment our last hour in london. After breakfast and coffee we decided it was absolutely necessary for four adults to buy peanuts and go spend 30 minutes feeding the squirrels in hyde park, just like the signs tell you not to do.

It was your run of the mill chaos with pigeons flying every which way and certain members of the group not understanding that throwing peanuts AT someone equals being mauled by stupid smelly birds and the occasional cute squirrel. The squirrels in Hyde Park are nice and take peanuts from your hand as if they were gentle hamsters. No tugging, no biting - they know exactly what's going on.

And yet... It was all good fun until I stopped doling out cashews to adjust the camera lens. My decision to stop led to a squirrel shimmying up my leg to my shoulder to my arm, at which point a tug-of-war for the small bag ensued. The squirrel scrabbled, I shook my arm and said "Nonononono" and then a pigeon joined the squirrel. Things went quickly from good fun to being hilarious. I'm trying to work the camera, the squirrel is trying to work the bag of nuts and the pigeon is seemingly just hanging along for the ride. The squirrel ended up accidentally biting me before I flung it off and tossed the bag of snacks to someone else, after which I tried to stop somewhat heavy bleeding from the thumb and simultaneously search for a tissue and half-punch any pigeon that tried to land on me.

There were blood spatters all around the bench by which we had been standing. It looked like a tiny war-zone. Miraculously, no one was crapped on.

I'm not extremely worried about the bite, but just in case I'll be paying a visit to some doctor or other by monday to get a tetanus shot. But I more or less held a squirrel today. One of my dreams has come true.

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